An OurObamaNation News Brief
President Barack 'Dip Stick' Obama is preparing to address the nation outlining how his extensive experience as community organizer allows him to counteract at the local level the ineptness his administration has brought to the national level.
White House Press Secretary 'OG' Gibbs stated the President has years of experience as a community organizer helping poor communities deal with poor government. The President's policies are geared to creating the kind of communities the President knows how to help.
Gibbs refused to answer any questions concerning the ongoing oil spill in the gulf or the Sestak political bride scandal that has engulfed the Obama administration potentially threatening impeachment of this undocumented Mother Liberal President.
Showing posts with label Gibbs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gibbs. Show all posts
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Obama Plan Day 41
OurObamaNation has learned than President Barack 'Insane ACORN' Obama has decided to take matters into his own hands if the BP's "golf ball in the hole" solution fails to stop the oil leak threatening the entire Gulf Coast.
The President plans to instead use the golf balls to do what he does best during a crisis and that is to golf. The President plans to allow BP to stick any Democrat or member of his administration involved in the Congressman Joe 'Takes More Than That' Sestak scandal down the hole.
Rumours our the President is also willing to sacrifice any Democrat or member of his administration who has ever failed to pay their taxes or was involved in any of his administration's other poor decisions including TARP, the stimulus, health care reform, cap and trade, immigration, the handling of either war, or the events leading up to the beer summit.
White House Press Secretary Robert 'OG' Gibbs stated the President is considering using Vice President Biden, Speaker Pelosi, and Majority Leader Reid as plugs, also, if necessary.
The President who was golfing could not be reached for comment. The President's teleprompter was ,also, unavailable.
The President plans to instead use the golf balls to do what he does best during a crisis and that is to golf. The President plans to allow BP to stick any Democrat or member of his administration involved in the Congressman Joe 'Takes More Than That' Sestak scandal down the hole.
Rumours our the President is also willing to sacrifice any Democrat or member of his administration who has ever failed to pay their taxes or was involved in any of his administration's other poor decisions including TARP, the stimulus, health care reform, cap and trade, immigration, the handling of either war, or the events leading up to the beer summit.
White House Press Secretary Robert 'OG' Gibbs stated the President is considering using Vice President Biden, Speaker Pelosi, and Majority Leader Reid as plugs, also, if necessary.
The President who was golfing could not be reached for comment. The President's teleprompter was ,also, unavailable.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Terrorist Lawyer on Board
Our ObamaNation New Brief
President Obama announced today that all flights having an Air Marshall must also have a lawyer on board.
White House Press Secretary Gibbs stated President Obama is committed to seeing that terrorists are read their Miranda rights and given a lawyer while still aboard the plane.
President Obama announced today that all flights having an Air Marshall must also have a lawyer on board.
White House Press Secretary Gibbs stated President Obama is committed to seeing that terrorists are read their Miranda rights and given a lawyer while still aboard the plane.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Brown Scotts on Back of Pants
An Our ObamaNation News Brief:
Most Democrats around the country including all those elected to public office are reporting large Brown Scotts on the back of their pants.
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs stated President Obama arose today to learn they was not a single pair of pants in the White House that was not soiled with Brown Scotts.
Most Democrats around the country including all those elected to public office are reporting large Brown Scotts on the back of their pants.
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs stated President Obama arose today to learn they was not a single pair of pants in the White House that was not soiled with Brown Scotts.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Dot Dot Dot
An Our Obamanation News Brief
The alleged President of the United States Barack 'ACORN' Obama stated the following:
"Our intelligence community failed to connect the dots."
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs stated the 6 Guantanamo terrorist sent to Yemen right before Christmas will be the last we release to Yemen at least until al-Qaeda requests more recruits to perform human caused disasters.
The alleged President of the United States Barack 'ACORN' Obama stated the following:
"Our intelligence community failed to connect the dots."
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs stated the 6 Guantanamo terrorist sent to Yemen right before Christmas will be the last we release to Yemen at least until al-Qaeda requests more recruits to perform human caused disasters.
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Getting Obama Tough on Disasters
An Our ObamaNation News Brief
When the alleged President of the United States gets back from a very long vacation in Hawaii he plans to attempt to find time in his busy schedule to address his administration's lax attitude towards human caused disasters such as one that almost occurred on Flight 253 over Detroit on Christmas Day.
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs stated the President Obama is considering getting as tough on those who attempt to blow up planes over American cities as he now is in stopping the tea party gatherings. Gibbs added the President is dedicated to stopping all those who oppose his plans for health care, cap and trade, and unlimited federal spending but does understand that although the terrorist love the President and side with his policies they still must be stopped from celebrating his election as President by blowing up planes full of Americans. Gibbs explained the President is having a hard time moving forward and realizing the acts of domestic violence and hatred for America Obama so admired in his friends and spiritual leaders in Chicago are not as well suited for a decade where he is the one in power.
When the alleged President of the United States gets back from a very long vacation in Hawaii he plans to attempt to find time in his busy schedule to address his administration's lax attitude towards human caused disasters such as one that almost occurred on Flight 253 over Detroit on Christmas Day.
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs stated the President Obama is considering getting as tough on those who attempt to blow up planes over American cities as he now is in stopping the tea party gatherings. Gibbs added the President is dedicated to stopping all those who oppose his plans for health care, cap and trade, and unlimited federal spending but does understand that although the terrorist love the President and side with his policies they still must be stopped from celebrating his election as President by blowing up planes full of Americans. Gibbs explained the President is having a hard time moving forward and realizing the acts of domestic violence and hatred for America Obama so admired in his friends and spiritual leaders in Chicago are not as well suited for a decade where he is the one in power.
Obamerica as Joke
An Our ObamaNation News Brief
The White House is ordering all Obamericans when traveling abroad to bow to every person they meet.
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs stated President Obama is convinced that the only effective device we are as nation have to combat the conversion of otherwise normal people to become terrorists against America is to follow the President's lead and for every American to bow to everyone who is not an American.
In fact as part of the new health care bill, the President is proposing that every American be forced to have free back operation so that Americans when standing will have a bowed stature.
The White House is ordering all Obamericans when traveling abroad to bow to every person they meet.
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs stated President Obama is convinced that the only effective device we are as nation have to combat the conversion of otherwise normal people to become terrorists against America is to follow the President's lead and for every American to bow to everyone who is not an American.
In fact as part of the new health care bill, the President is proposing that every American be forced to have free back operation so that Americans when standing will have a bowed stature.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Obama's Super Cleric
Our ObamaNation has learned that Anwar al-Awlaki was cleric to both Major Nidal Malik Hasan(Fort Hood)and Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab(Flight 253).
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs is denying rumors that Cleric Anwar al-Awlaki has replaced Revered Wright as President Obama's spiritual leader.
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs is denying rumors that Cleric Anwar al-Awlaki has replaced Revered Wright as President Obama's spiritual leader.
Obama's Jihad Airlines
Our ObamaNation has learned that Barack Obama, the alleged President of the United States, is planning to ask Congress to set a side just sly of a trillion dollars in funding to purchase an airplane for every would be terrorist.
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs stated The President has determined that if every terrorist has their own plane there will no reason for them to fly on commercial airlines.
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs stated The President has determined that if every terrorist has their own plane there will no reason for them to fly on commercial airlines.
A Mix of Human and Systemic Failure
Our ObamaNation has learned that Barack Obama, the alleged President of the United States, admits his administration, in fact, the entire executive branch of the Federal Government is a complex and complete "mix of human and systemic failure".
White House Press Secretary Gibbs stated look real unemployment is over 15%, spending and the debt are out of control, we have no idea what we are doing in Iraq or Afghanistan, the stimulus bill was a bust, the President wants to do nothing besides play golf and basketball and give meaningless speeches, and the liberal left wing controlled Congress is focused solely on undermining health care and our nation's ability to produce energy. Gibbs added we cannot even agree on what to call the war on terror so are you really surprised we have no idea how to handle airline security? Gibbs implied no one dares to mention the FBI, CIA or Homeland Security when the President is within earshot and that was before Flight 253.
White House Press Secretary Gibbs stated look real unemployment is over 15%, spending and the debt are out of control, we have no idea what we are doing in Iraq or Afghanistan, the stimulus bill was a bust, the President wants to do nothing besides play golf and basketball and give meaningless speeches, and the liberal left wing controlled Congress is focused solely on undermining health care and our nation's ability to produce energy. Gibbs added we cannot even agree on what to call the war on terror so are you really surprised we have no idea how to handle airline security? Gibbs implied no one dares to mention the FBI, CIA or Homeland Security when the President is within earshot and that was before Flight 253.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Don't Ask Don' t Tell
An Our ObamaNation News Brief
Our ObamaNation has learned that President Obama on his first day in office extended the Don't Ask Don't Tell policy to include al Qaeda terrorists in the military.
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs stated the President does not see any reason that al Qaeda terrorists who want to fight for this country not be allowed to proudly serve.
Our ObamaNation has learned that President Obama on his first day in office extended the Don't Ask Don't Tell policy to include al Qaeda terrorists in the military.
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs stated the President does not see any reason that al Qaeda terrorists who want to fight for this country not be allowed to proudly serve.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Month 3 No Decision
An Our Obamanation News Brief
President, Community Organizer, Noble Peace Prize Winner, and Spiritual Marxist Barack H'Insane 'Acorn' Obama is still undecided on what to do in Afghanistan.
White House Press Secretary Robert 'Ogee' Gibbs stated the President can now find Afghanistan on a world map but still has no time to devote to actually formulating a strategy on how to find the time to actually consider what speech or apology he thinks would work best to bringing peace to the region.
President, Community Organizer, Noble Peace Prize Winner, and Spiritual Marxist Barack H'Insane 'Acorn' Obama is still undecided on what to do in Afghanistan.
White House Press Secretary Robert 'Ogee' Gibbs stated the President can now find Afghanistan on a world map but still has no time to devote to actually formulating a strategy on how to find the time to actually consider what speech or apology he thinks would work best to bringing peace to the region.
Full Backing of Obama
An Our ObamaNation News Brief:
Strong opposition to Obama's policies caused voters to ejected the Democratic candidates for governor in Virginia and New Jersey. Both of these candidates were strongly backed by national money from the Democrat party including multiple campaign appearances by President Obama.
White House Press Secretary Robert 'Ogee' Gibbs stated the President frequent appearances on behalf of these 2 candidates in no way implies the President actually supported either of these candidates and the President agrees with the voters that both of these candidates were indeed big time losers unworthy of holding public office. Gibbs added the President thinks most elected Democrats are unworthy but promises to campaign for their reelection anyway. Gibbs lamented that look the President realizes it comes with the job.
Strong opposition to Obama's policies caused voters to ejected the Democratic candidates for governor in Virginia and New Jersey. Both of these candidates were strongly backed by national money from the Democrat party including multiple campaign appearances by President Obama.
White House Press Secretary Robert 'Ogee' Gibbs stated the President frequent appearances on behalf of these 2 candidates in no way implies the President actually supported either of these candidates and the President agrees with the voters that both of these candidates were indeed big time losers unworthy of holding public office. Gibbs added the President thinks most elected Democrats are unworthy but promises to campaign for their reelection anyway. Gibbs lamented that look the President realizes it comes with the job.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Mao as Role Model
An Our ObamaNation News Brief
Anita Dunn, the White House communications director, stated the following as speaker at a high school graduation about Mao who murdered betwen 40 and 70 million of his fellow country men:
“The third lesson and tip actually comes from two of my favorite political philosophers, Mao Tse-Tung and Mother Teresa. Not often coupled with each other, but the two people that I turn to most to basically deliver a simple point, which is: You’re going to make choices. . . . But here’s the deal: These are your choices; they are no one else’s. In 1947, when Mao Tse-Tung was being challenged within his own party on his own plan to basically take China over, Chiang Kai-Shek and the nationalist Chinese held the cities, they had the army. . . . They had everything on their side. And people said ‘How can you win . . . ? How can you do this against all of the odds against you?’ And Mao Tse-Tung says, ‘You fight your war and I’ll fight mine . . . ’ You don’t have to accept the definition of how to do things. . . . You fight your war, you let them fight theirs. Everybody has their own path.”
White House Press Secretary Robert 'Ogee' Gibbs stated that President Obama understands fully why Dunn would want to work for the President and have Mao as a role model.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Doctors as Props
Our ObamaNation has learned that President, Community Organizer, and Citizen of the World Barack H'insane 'ACORN' Obama thinks health care reform consists of merely giving doctors white coats and having a picture taken using the doctors as mere props in a White House photo shot.
White House Press Secretary Robert 'Ogee' Gibbs stated the President was not being racism in having the doctors wear only white coats. Gibbs added the President is well aware that there is more to being a doctor than having a white coat. The President understands a doctor must have a stethoscope, also.
White House trick or treat is the Obama substitute for debate.
Mmm, mmm, mmm, Barack Hussein Obama
White House trick or treat
White coats on the domestic beat
White flags on an international retreat
White wash double speak then repeat
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Agony of Defeat
An ObamaNation News Brief
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs stated the President experienced the agony of Olympic defeat due to the following unforeseen factors:
IOC rejected the offer of the First Lady setting on their laps during the entire 2016 games.
IOC rejected having dead members of the IOC be allowed to vote.
IOC rejected the new IOC voting members that ACORN had registered around the world.
IOC rejected Oprah's offer of giving out Olympic tickets to her television audience for the games.
IOC rejected the President's offer to apologize for a former United States international mistake every time the United States won a medal.
Mmm, mmm, mmm, Barack Hussein Obama
He experienced the Agony of Defeat
In Denmark
In Afghanistan
In Iran
In Russia
In Gitmo
In Honduras
In the UN
He fooled America
He beat McCain
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs stated the President experienced the agony of Olympic defeat due to the following unforeseen factors:
IOC rejected the offer of the First Lady setting on their laps during the entire 2016 games.
IOC rejected having dead members of the IOC be allowed to vote.
IOC rejected the new IOC voting members that ACORN had registered around the world.
IOC rejected Oprah's offer of giving out Olympic tickets to her television audience for the games.
IOC rejected the President's offer to apologize for a former United States international mistake every time the United States won a medal.
Mmm, mmm, mmm, Barack Hussein Obama
He experienced the Agony of Defeat
In Denmark
In Afghanistan
In Iran
In Russia
In Gitmo
In Honduras
In the UN
He fooled America
He beat McCain
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Only Words
Our ObamaNation has learned that Vice President Biden stated on September 17, 2009 the following:
"Iran — a key concern for the United States — was not a threat.
"I think we are fully capable and secure dealing with any present or future potential Iranian threat."
"The whole purpose of this exercise we are undertaking is to diminish the prospect of the Iranians destabilizing that region in the world. I am less concerned — much less concerned — about the Iranian potential."
Yet, President Obama stated on September 25, 2009 based on information available to him since his election the following:
"The new Iranian plant, the country's second uranium enrichment facility, is believed by U.S. officials to be part of a broad effort by Iran's leadership to pursue the ability to build nuclear weapons. Iran has repeatedly denied having any such goal, insisting that its nuclear program is aimed at generating electricity. U.S. officials said they believe the Qom plant is not yet operational but is intended to produce highly enriched uranium — suitable for nuclear weapons — and will be capable within months of producing enough material for at least one bomb per year."
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs clarified these statements by stating President Obama and Vice President Biden simply do not see Iran having a nuclear bomb as a threat.
Mmm, mmm, mmm, Barack Hussein Obama
He said all should lend a hand to making Iran a nuclear nation
Mmm, mmm, mmm, Barack Hussein Obama
He said we must be fair, equal bombs means equal altercation
"Iran — a key concern for the United States — was not a threat.
"I think we are fully capable and secure dealing with any present or future potential Iranian threat."
"The whole purpose of this exercise we are undertaking is to diminish the prospect of the Iranians destabilizing that region in the world. I am less concerned — much less concerned — about the Iranian potential."
Yet, President Obama stated on September 25, 2009 based on information available to him since his election the following:
"The new Iranian plant, the country's second uranium enrichment facility, is believed by U.S. officials to be part of a broad effort by Iran's leadership to pursue the ability to build nuclear weapons. Iran has repeatedly denied having any such goal, insisting that its nuclear program is aimed at generating electricity. U.S. officials said they believe the Qom plant is not yet operational but is intended to produce highly enriched uranium — suitable for nuclear weapons — and will be capable within months of producing enough material for at least one bomb per year."
White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs clarified these statements by stating President Obama and Vice President Biden simply do not see Iran having a nuclear bomb as a threat.
Mmm, mmm, mmm, Barack Hussein Obama
He said all should lend a hand to making Iran a nuclear nation
Mmm, mmm, mmm, Barack Hussein Obama
He said we must be fair, equal bombs means equal altercation
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Another Bush?
Our ObamaNation has learned that fellow world leader Ayman al-Zawahri stated the following about President, Former Community Organizer, and Citizen of the World Barack H'insane 'ACORN' Obama.
"America has come in a new, hypocritical face. Smiling at us, but stabbing us with the same dagger that Bush used. God willing, your end will be at the hands of the Muslim nation, so that the world and history will be free of your crimes and lies."
Ayman al-Zawahri added he would be happy to set down at a beer summit with President Obama and discuss how the President is acting stupidly and merely getting wee weed up about the threat posed by al-Qaida. Ayman al-Zawahri explained al-Qaida is looking forward to having a seat at the Obama table and believes that al-Qaida could play the same role internationally that ACORN does nationally for Obama. Ayman al-Zawahri stated community organizing is and has always been the primary mission of al-Qaida.
Ayman al-Zawahri joked that if Vice President Biden will show him the Biden cave he will show Biden his.
White House press Secretary Robert 'Ogee' Gibbs stated the President is considering apologizing for America's crimes and lies against al-Qaida the day the President closes 'Gitmo'. Gibbs added that the President has no intention of bowing to Ayman al-Zawahri unless Ayman al-Zawahri promises to bow afterwards.
"America has come in a new, hypocritical face. Smiling at us, but stabbing us with the same dagger that Bush used. God willing, your end will be at the hands of the Muslim nation, so that the world and history will be free of your crimes and lies."
Ayman al-Zawahri added he would be happy to set down at a beer summit with President Obama and discuss how the President is acting stupidly and merely getting wee weed up about the threat posed by al-Qaida. Ayman al-Zawahri explained al-Qaida is looking forward to having a seat at the Obama table and believes that al-Qaida could play the same role internationally that ACORN does nationally for Obama. Ayman al-Zawahri stated community organizing is and has always been the primary mission of al-Qaida.
Ayman al-Zawahri joked that if Vice President Biden will show him the Biden cave he will show Biden his.
White House press Secretary Robert 'Ogee' Gibbs stated the President is considering apologizing for America's crimes and lies against al-Qaida the day the President closes 'Gitmo'. Gibbs added that the President has no intention of bowing to Ayman al-Zawahri unless Ayman al-Zawahri promises to bow afterwards.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Now Children
Our ObamaNation has learned that Department of Energy Secretary Chu stated the following about Americans energy use:
“The American public…just like your teenage kids, aren’t acting in a way that they should act. The American public has to really understand in their core how important this issue is.”
White House Press Secretary Robert 'Ogee' Gibbs stated the President thinks Americans are acting stupidly, childish, and slightly racist in their opposition to the President's energy proposals.
“The American public…just like your teenage kids, aren’t acting in a way that they should act. The American public has to really understand in their core how important this issue is.”
White House Press Secretary Robert 'Ogee' Gibbs stated the President thinks Americans are acting stupidly, childish, and slightly racist in their opposition to the President's energy proposals.
No Response
Our ObamaNation has learned that President and Former Community Organizer Barack H'insane 'ACORN' Obama plans no federal government response to the massive and life threatening flooding in Georgia and South Carolina.
White House Press Secretary Robert 'Ogee' Gibbs stated the President simply does not see that the flooding in the south is one of the bigger issues facing his administration. Gibbs added the President has a very busy schedule of TV appearances and has no plans to address issues such as flooding, Afghanistan, or the use of federal money to fund underage prostitution.
White House Press Secretary Robert 'Ogee' Gibbs stated the President simply does not see that the flooding in the south is one of the bigger issues facing his administration. Gibbs added the President has a very busy schedule of TV appearances and has no plans to address issues such as flooding, Afghanistan, or the use of federal money to fund underage prostitution.
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